Well, after the disastrous ending of the last Character Backstage, I think we’re done with these interviews. Thank you, everyone, for—
[thumping off stage]
Lissa: Hey! We want to play!
Kari: Yeah! We can sit in chairs and talk just like grown-ups!
Kari: Everybody else got to play. Don’t be mean!
[They each climb into a chair.]
All right. Go ahead.
Kari: What do we do?
Uh, you ask questions.
Kari: [beaming] I’m good at this!
Lissa: We have to ask grown-up questions. [voice deepens, becomes stern] Kari, why did you eat all the chocolate cookies?
Kari: I shared them with you!
Lissa: You did not!
Kari: I did too. I put them on a plate and I said, “These are for Lissa.” But you didn’t eat them, and I didn’t want to waste them.
Lissa: Kari Thorne, you go to your room!
Kari: No! It’s my turn to ask a question. Don’t you think Marley is pretty?
Lissa: I dunno. She’s not pretty like the other ladies Uncle Zachariah knows. But she has a very nice smile.
Kari: Lissa Thorne, you go to your room!
Lissa: Why? I answered!
Kari: I think Marley and Uncle Zach should get married. Then Marley could stay with us all the time.
Lissa: I don’t know if that’s a good idea…
Kari: Why not?
Lissa: Dunno. Might make some people grumpy.
Kari: Those people are mean and don’t deserve Marley.
Lissa: I guess so. My turn. You should give me your doll, since you ate my cookies.
Kari: What? No way! You had your own doll, I saw it.
Lissa: I lost it. When—
Lissa: What was that?
There are some things you’re not supposed to talk about in these interviews.
Kari: Why not? What are we supposed to talk about?
Casual things. Interpersonal things.
Kari: I don’t know what that means. What does the voice mean, Lissa?
Lissa: Boring things, I think.
Kari: [big sigh] Of course.
Lissa: I think if we made the voice and the camera go away, we could say whatever we wanted, though.
Kari: Can’t be bad.
Lissa: Not bad. Just point them at boring stuff. All the boring things they want.
Kari: Ooh! Like that tv channel with lots of old men talking.
Lissa: Yeah. Like that. Have fun, voice person.
Kari: You mean don’t have fun.
Lissa: Oh yeah. Bye!